Amy M. Spagnola

CONTENT CREATOR*DIGITAL STORYTELLER*FASHION FANATIC

10 Things that Were So Wrong with Meghan Markle and Prince Harry's Engagement Photos

No, it's not a casting call for Dancing with the Stars or even Disney on Ice, actually, these are the official engagement photos from Prince Harry and Meghan Markle! WTF? Bucking all royal tradition and decorum, Media Meg has done a stellar job of bypassing all the groundwork laid by Kate for proper princess protocol. Forget the fascinators, tights and morning coats--Meghan or Me(again) has decided that nothing beats a morning walk in the park in a flamboyant feathered, sheer bodice dress (#nipplealert) that cost more than most people's yearly salary.



Hailing from a very poor family, you'd think Meghan would shun such a spectacle. Nah!

Giving a big middle finger to the typical royal standards of demure and tasteful, Nutmeg has indeed decided to make her own style rules and opt for a laughable and bizarre ice skater dress in the official engagement photos for the couple. Though they claim they've received tons of warm wishes and messages, many comments appear to disagree with the 'Hollywood staged' vibe of these ostentatious and odd pictures.

Dwarfing Khloe Kardashian's pregnancy announcement (we bet KoKo was teed off) the ginger and his brunette Z-list actress are causing a crazy media circus. The Markle Debarkle ensues.

Let's investigate closer...

Here are 10 Things that Were So Wrong with Meghan Markle and Prince Harry's Engagement Photos:


1. Privacy Please, Wait Never Mind


For a couple who suffered abuse at the hands of unfriendly media and who begged for privacy, these engagement photos are an awfully big, bold and attention-grabbing display for a couple longing for the quiet life.  They even released an extra (bonus) third photograph to the public. It's a bit hypocritical to issue statements seeking privacy and then also release engagement glamour shots.


2. The Cost of the Dress



The over-the-top, sheer bodice embellished Ralph & Russo gown worn by the Suits actress was a sly move to win English favor as the label is British but the move totally backfired. The outrageous price tag was a huge turnoff for many. Not given on loan but 'privately purchased' the couture dress was egregiously expensive.  At almost $75,000 it was a lot more extravagant than the creamy white Reiss sheath dress worn by the Duchess of Cambridge for her engagement (with a paltry price tag of $300). In fact, Meg managed to spend half of Kate's yearly shopping bill on one outfit! For Meghan and Harry, who seem dedicated to being do-gooders, the price tag on Meghan's black and gold ball gown was rather offensive. Why not spend all that money on charity Meg and Harry?


3. The Style of the Dress



While Markle did wear a Victoria Beckham (her latest BFF, Bye Bye Serena) sweater for her up close portrait shot with the Prince, her featured look was the gothic-tiered-ruffled-Big Bird dress from Ralph & Russo. Labeled 'distasteful' by many for its similarity to a showgirl style ensemble, many commenters thought Meghan looked like she was off to the Bellagio in Las Vegas for a special cameo in a Celine Dion concert. Terribly strange when offset by Harry's basic blue business suit and tie, these two did not look especially well-matched.


4. The Kate Copying



Markle opted for a simple but nearly $1000 cream cashmere sweater from Brit Victoria Beckham for her engagement shoot. These two have become fast friends as they're both equally obsessed with social climbing and status. While Beckham would never have given lowly Suits actress Meghan the time of day, as the soon-to-be Duchess of Sussex, Posh Spice is totally interested in slumber parities and girls weekends. Not only did Sparkle Markle copy Kate's white sweater look but she's also been following the Duchess with similar hand poses, nail styles and of course, the big shiny voluminous blowouts. Although, Kate was arguably a more natural beauty in younger years.


5. Meghan is Trying too Hard


Whether she's trying to be glam with her fashion editorial glitzy engagement photos or attempting to look like Princess Diana, Meghan is all over the board with her fashion attempts. One minute she's in a demure trench and turtleneck, the next thing look is a sheer top with a tulle ballerina skirt. The real Meghan is very ordinary looking (sans professional makeup, hair and clothing) and would likely not even warrant a second glance in the grocery store.


6. Harry's Not Photogenic?


Comments on the engagement photos also included a few describing Harry as looking old and distant. One commenter even said he looked like he was 43-years-old instead of 33. No doubt Meghan selected the pictures to be released to the public and none of them are terribly flattering of Harry. PH looks a tad aged, stiff and has weird eye expressions and serious pensive face.

7. They Went Hollywood



Markle Sparkle and Hollywood Harry chose Alex Lubomirski to shoot their 'just a walk in the park in $75,000 dress' shoot. Photographing stars like Nicole Kidman, Kate Winslet and Julia Roberts, Alex has an impressive roster of celeb clients. This is in stark contrast to the way Kate Middleton often opts to shoot pictures of her own family--which she releases to the public. How down-to-earth and refreshing! (Above photo: Alex at Work)

8. It Was All Way Too Vegas



Even Newsweek Magazine thought Markle went way too Leaving Las Vegas. The magazine said Markle's dress was "an odd choice" for a daylight photo shoot. And the publication went on to note that the dress was more appropriate for a "red carpet event" and not an engagement photo shoot. Ouch! Meghan better find a new stylist pronto! The really crazy/funny/amazing thing is that Markle's character on Suits wore SO many perfectly prim and proper pencil skirts, sheath dresses and tasteful cardigan sets. Couldn't Meg just have borrowed from Rachel Zane's closet?!


9. Brother and Sister Much?


Some commenters noticed the erie lookalike quality of Meg and Harry. After all, Meghan's plastic surgery nose and Harry's sloped schnoz do make for a twinning twosome. Both also share similar chins, cheekbones and grins. The real lookalike factor is the nose. Both have a ski slope nose that widens at the base and has a triangular appearance. Meghan's formerly wide nose has been narrowed thus becoming more similar to Harry's longer pointy-at-the-end nose. Ironically, Meg's nose job is probably not the greatest as the sides were overly refined and the tip was pinched and became a bit bulbous--but it does look similar to Harry's imperfect natural nose. The laughable thing is that Meghan who some have called 'fake' thanked her dad for the 'signature Markle nose' even though she's clearly had a rhinoplasty procedure (according to three of the nation's top plastic surgeons).

10. Eau de Meghan



One hilarious commenter on the Daily Mail claimed the couple looked posed as if for a cologne or perfume ad. Another commenter even suggested the fragrance they could be hawking: Harkle: Deceived--A New Fragrance. Many thought the sheer bodice of Markle's dress was particularly tacky, vulgar and unrefined. Others thought it screamed 'wannabe Hollywood' and many felt Markle was shunning royal protocol to an obscene degree. Furthermore, many commenters said that William and Kate were much more natural and comfortable together in their engagement photos--likely because they hadn't only known each other for a little over a year in a long distance love affair before getting engaged. Other commenters said the whole thing was cringy and even a commoner like Meghan should've known better than to wear a see-through top for her engagement attire.

Meghan is breaking all the royal rules. Here comes trouble.

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1 comment

Deborah Sullivan said...

Oh my god!!! I LOVE your style, your outright screw-em all! I'm going tell the truth of a situation/style/couple/etc!. I'm a markle hater to,but nutmeg makes it so easy.